Question:
Article 84 of the "Bro Code" states: A Bro shall stop whatever he's doing and watch Die Hard if it's on TV. - Ditto The Shawshank Redemption -Also Top Gun, The Big Lebowski, and the first half of Full Metal Jacket.
My question is this: Is this list extensive enough? Has the hallowed Code of Bro's accurately and fully covered the list of movies worthy of full stoppage of any and all activities, or is this Article in need of amendment?
-El Tigre Gringo (Creighton)
Dear El Tigre Gringo,
Response:
Your questions. Phenomenal. Your recitation of the Bro Code. Flawless. However flawless your recitation has been, it has brought me to the attention of the absolutely necessity of amending Article 84 of the "Bro Code". Follow me on a broscapade through explanation:
My stance: Amendment is imminent and necessary.
Proposed changes:
(i) the list of movies is restrictive and counterproductive to all things bro. example: I am grilling steaks outside on my charcoal bro grill while the smoke embellishes the entire yard leaving me in broville USA. It is completely unjust to suggest that I should cease all activity in the midst of my climaxing broification to come down on the bro level by walking inside to watch TV.
(ii) Arnold Schwartzanegger fails to be in any of these movies. NOT A SINGLE ONE. If he's not bro then I don't know who is.
(iii) we define the word bro.
Suggested Final Amended Article:
Article 84: A bro shall stop whatever he's doing (unless he is currently maximizing broage (ex. fishing out of the back of his Ford F450 with a case of Keystone)) and watch Die Hard if it's on TV. Ditto The Shawshank Redemption -Also Top Gun, The Big Lebowski, any Schwarzanegger movie, and the first half of Full Metal Jacket.
Happy Bro-ing,
Stewblogger
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